


None of them is ours

by Itsamess



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers Endgame Spoilers, F/M, Gen, Natasha Romanov deserved better, You Have Been Warned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2019-04-26
Packaged: 2020-02-07 03:32:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18612250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itsamess/pseuds/Itsamess
Summary: Tony has got the hero's funeral.Black suits, flower bouquets, commemorative speeches by friends and family, even a statement on the evening news.Clint doesn't know how to handle such a blatant expression of grief. He finds it inappropriate, almost tacky, in comparison with the hundreds of deads that will never be mourned.Deaths like Natasha's, for one thing.





	None of them is ours

**Author's Note:**

> "There are a lot of names in history  
> but none of them is ours"
> 
> Richard Siken

Tony has got the hero's funeral.  
Black suits, flower bouquets, commemorative speeches by friends and family, even a statement on the evening news. The backyard of the cottage where he had been living for the past 5 years has been temporarily turned into a shrine, full of Iron Man toys and letters signed by sad faces.

People are also submitting a petition to create a flowerbed in his honor in the middle of Central Park, but honestly Clint doesn't care much about it: he doesn't know how to handle such a blatant expression of grief. He finds it inappropriate, almost tacky, in comparison with the hundreds of deads that will never be mourned.  
Deaths like Natasha's, for one thing.

There has been no memorial service for her, also because the church would have been quite empty. As Steve pointed out, her only family were her friends, so there is no one to notify or contact. And somehow it's comforting to know that they won't have to lie to any stranger about the circumstances of her death: try talking about an enchanted cliff on a distant planet named Vormir... people will wonder if the death of your best friend has made you lose your damn mind.  
So Clint stays silent, as he stands on the lake shore watching the fireworks show dedicated to Tony Stark.

It has been two days, but it's still so surreal... Clint keeps turning or looking out for her with the corner of his eyes, but there's just a void behind him. Nat is really gone.

Clint is not an idiot, he has always known this was a possibility: becoming an Avenger meant accepting the risk of dying day in and day out, and Natasha knew exactly what she was signing for when she joined the S.H.I.E.LD.  
But, you know. It's still strange.  
Maybe when you spend all your life at death's door and he doesn't open up the first, the second, the hundredth time... well, maybe you start to think you'll get away with it forever.

Clint's car has been parked in front of a flower shop for thirty-two minutes. He can't get out of the car. Well, he could, if he just tried.  
The truth is that he doesn't know which kind of flowers Natasha liked, and there's no grave anyway, because her body is somewhere in deep space, carefully guarded like an object at the pawn shop.

In the end, that's what it was. Just a trade, wasn't it?  
Her life in exchange for an Infinity Stone, a snap of fingers in exchange for the salvation of billions of people.  
Tony's sacrifice will take four chapters of his massive biography, available from July in the best bookstores.  
Natasha's will be just one line in her obituary.

Almost twenty years ago, Clint has made her an offer so crazy and ridiculous that it almost looked like a joke.  
Joining the same organization that wanted her dead. Joining the S.H.I.E.L.D., even just to know what if feels like to be among the good guys, for once. They could have been heroes, together, even just for one day. 

Natasha had just laughed at him, replying: " Alright, David Bowie. Let me tell you a secret. Heroes are not real. And even if they were... believe me, I wouldn't be one of them". 

She must had heard it in some movie, but she truly believed it as if it had been her life's mantra.  
Natasha probably died still believing it, but if Clint could see her one more time, he would tell her she is damn wrong - she may not have lived a hero, but she died as one.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, English is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistake.  
> I just wanted to give her and Clint some closure, that's it.


End file.
